Stresstabs

Once you have your very first Stresstabs pill at my age, you very well know that your fate is sealed.

You just know that there would be more pills for you to swallow and more paperwork to haunt you forever. You know that as the first pill dissolves in your stomach and runs through your system, that you would be condemned for life as being the busiest person in the entire universe (in an overdramatic sense) and your social life becomes close to nonexistent.

You see yourself nose high in paperwork and hideously black eye bags. You will continually work yourself into a frenzy and your nerves would just about be ready to short-circuit.

For the past four months, I forgot how I looked without the eye bags. It’s something that comes along with being extremely busy and multitasking virtually everything. When I get extremely busy, I usually no longer walk down the corridors, but instead haunt them with a possessed look.

At the rate that I am going, I am sure that I would be making the makers of Stresstabs very, very happy. (And I in turn, stress-free.)

As I bought my first eight 7+1 Stresstabs (with Iron) packs at some nondescript pharmacy after a harrowing doctor’s check-up, I wondered how many other stressed souls were buying Stresstabs at that very evening.

With everything going on around us, who wouldn’t be stressed out?

I glanced at the guy next to me, wondering if the prices of the medication he bought stressed him out. With prices skyrocketing to Pluto, I wouldn’t be surprised if random people on the streets would die due stress attacks.

My friends and I have this tendency to think like extremely old people, and remember the yesteryears where with 5 pesos one could buy a lot of things and one could still go home with only 3 pesos in ones pocket. Only remembering these things makes me want to consume an entire 7+1 Stresstabs pack in one sitting.

They say that stress will make you look old, which in a way seems fitting on me and my friends (since we think like old people). But then again, looking old at my age stresses me out (since I obviously don’t want to look old), which in turn makes me stress about not stressing about stressing about looking old. Am I making sense?